Precisely one week earlier than the “Scandoval” broke the Web, I discovered myself in an LA dance membership seated subsequent to the one and solely Ariana Madix. We each offered at “The Crappies,” an annual occasion hosted by Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam of the Watch What Crappens podcast — and, after the occasion, we each headed to an afterparty.

This wasn’t the primary time I’ve run into Vanderpump Guidelines solid members, and even the primary time I’ve been in the identical room as Ariana. However whereas she and I (and Tom Sandoval) had simply co-hosted a dwell podcast collectively a few weeks earlier, this night time marked the primary time we bought to legitimately hand around in a non-work associated setting and simply… chat.

Drinks had been flowing, and, in flip, so was the dialog—however nothing that night time even remotely hinted that Ariana was conscious of Tom’s infidelity or that there have been points in her relationship. She was completely satisfied, we talked about Schwartz & Sandy’s, and I even tried to persuade her to call a bagel sandwich after me at her future sandwich store. (The Kiki Membership, with ham as an alternative of turkey, thanks very a lot.)

We did, nonetheless, discuss failed relationships. My failed relationship, to be particular. As soon as we moved previous deli meats, we landed on the subject of how I ended up in Los Angeles. I instructed Ariana about my relationship of 9 years and the way it imploded. I instructed her that, though the break-up destroyed me on the time, it pressured me to pivot my whole life for the higher. I instructed her about how, 4 years later, it’s the most effective factor that ever occurred to me. 

The irony of this being my final dialog together with her simply days earlier than her personal long-term relationship imploded isn’t misplaced on me.

A mere 5 days after our trade within the membership, Ariana found an inappropriate video on Tom Sandoval’s cellphone that includes her (now ex-) greatest buddy, Raquel Leviss. After days of rumors, gossip, and leaks, we had been in a position to piece collectively that Tom and Raquel have been having a seven months-long affair behind everybody’s again—together with, it seems, even the Vanderpump Guidelines manufacturing crew. So though season 10 of Vanderpump Guidelines had already wrapped, it was cameras up once more to seize this main drama in our more and more much less area of interest nook of the universe. It additionally gave the VPR-obsessed amongst us a chance to rewatch each the present and previous seasons with eagle eyes, in search of any clues.

And through my very own rewatch, one factor was abundantly clear: Tom Sandoval and Tom Schwartz confirmed their true colours way back—however nobody noticed it.

Let me rely the methods with 20/20 hindsight:

• In Season 2, Kristen always tried to assert that Sandoval cheated on her with Ariana. He all the time denied it, however finally the 2 of them admitted they did share a kiss (however nothing extra) in Vegas. Through the season 2 reunion, Sandoval additionally confessed that he connected with a waitress in Vegas.
• In Season 3, Kristen spent a complete season attempting to destroy Sandoval and Ariana’s relationship, going as far as to ask a girl (we all know her as “Miami Lady”) who claimed to cheat with Tom to LA. Wanting again, all we might see was Kristen being… just a little unhinged. However as I re-watched the season, it appears extra possible that the reality was obscured by our hatred of Kristen.
• Whereas all of this was occurring, Tom Schwartz was within the background having a number of drunken makeout classes with girls, claiming he couldn’t bear in mind as a result of he was blackout drunk. 
• The accusations that Schwartz cheated whereas in Vegas had been by no means absolutely cleared up in season 5, both. Whether or not he slept with somebody, or whether or not they simply made out haven’t been confirmed.
• And whereas Schwartz might not have been essentially the most prolific cheater of the group, he helped set the bar lots low. Let’s not overlook he known as Katie a bitch and dumped a drink throughout her head after a heated argument on the streets of Cabo in season 2.

And these are just some bullet factors on the very lengthy, very messy laundry listing of very unhealthy Vanderpump habits. 

Regardless that all of the proof instructed us in any other case, all of us fell for Sandoval’s “good man” act the primary watch round, resulting in an sudden and common feeling of betrayal throughout the Bravo universe. Some would possibly name the widespread response parasocial, however, to me and so many fellow followers of Vanderpump, we felt the deception as a result of we’ve skilled the deception in our personal lives. Seeing the Scandoval performed out within the information pressured so many people to reexamine our personal experiences with dishonest, mendacity, and sneaking round.

Each lady I spoke with after the information broke displayed the identical sample of feelings — instant rage adopted by disappointment triggered by a current private reminiscence. Anybody who has ever found a textual content they didn’t wish to discover, has been lied to by a associate or greatest buddy, or simply been callously dumped for another person knew what Ariana was residing via, and it was heartbreaking.

And so, many people confirmed as much as be there for Ariana — even those that had by no means met her earlier than. Assist took on many types: Some followers felt shopping for merch from her sandwich store was the simplest technique to ship a digital pat on the again. For others, leaving scathing opinions of Tom’s bar on Yelp was way more cathartic. When it was reported that two of the Vanderpump eating places had their liquor licenses suspended, some even puzzled whether or not there was a #TeamAriana worker on the California Division of ABC. Whereas I wouldn’t advise the latter tactic (because it impacts the lives of extra than simply Sandoval), the neighborhood forming round Ariana has felt gorgeous and terribly empowering, to not point out therapeutic. It’s not typically that followers throughout the Bravo universe assist each other, not to mention agree on something so staunchly.  

When VPR first aired, it was a present about, and watched by, a bunch of 20 and early 30-somethings. Many viewers, like myself, in all probability labored within the hospitality world, and associated to the drama, backstabbing, and copious quantities of boozy nights and attractive hookups that include that way of life. However as we grew up and advanced, the present’s characters grew up and advanced alongside us (so we thought). They purchased homes, began companies, bought married, and located life companions, very similar to we did, or deliberate to do. These on-screen associates felt like extensions of ourselves and our personal lives.

However, 10 years later, we lastly know the reality about Tom. Certain, we had been fooled for a complete decade, however the veil has lastly been lifted. And disillusioned, shocked, and emotional as we may be, the Scandoval is precisely what we signed up for once we turned Vanderpump followers — whether or not we realized it or not. A good actuality present delivers drama and memorable one-liners; a nice actuality present delivers all that, and a dose of self-reflection. As increasingly actuality reveals chase the aspirational and unbelievable, Vanderpump, in its 10th season, has managed to convey the style again right down to earth with a way of relatability that made actuality TV so compelling to start with. Although many people would possibly by no means plant our sneakers in SUR, we will put ourselves in Ariana’s sneakers, and be much more invested in watching what occurs. 

So I’m not going to riot, I’m not going to attempt to convey down Toms’ eating places, and I’m undoubtedly not going to cry “hearth them.” However what I’m going to do is seize my popcorn, manifest fats paychecks for the whole solid (particularly Ariana), and remind myself that typically, the realest factor about actuality TV is that good guys aren’t actually all that good, in any case.

Featured picture courtesy of Getty Pictures.